Satin Robe, and the Next Chapter.

Today I've realized there is more to life than just the present. It's not about how your key board refuses to type every 20th key, or the fact that everyone you work with doesn't do half of what you do but gets paid more... its about more than that.
I can't sit and wait for the future or destiny to find me. I can't. I cannot sit and wait. I'm not your average person to follow the book. Who decided there was a book. It's my life, I'm the author so you better be ready to live life. I think too long I've waited for friends to come to me. I'm not one to go out all the time. I'm more than content to stay around the house and sip coffee while watching my cat peer out the window at the rain drops.
In about 19 days I start the next chapter in my life. So many people don't even get their next chapter. Their books end in a hospital, at their home, off the roof of a shed... why am I not living the fullest until it's my books turn to write it's final page? I want to be so many things. I want to be that perfect house wife, I want to be the powerful working woman my mother is, I want to be a mother. God has everything decided. I want to let him lead. My problem is, I haven't. I'm so excited to see whats going to happen.
Sometimes I wish my life was a musical. Let me tell you my theme song would be "Don't Rain on my Parade" another song would be " For Good" from Wicked. Gosh... Music... ahhhh... Well it's time I head to bed.. Big day tomorrow.

Love.

Flapper Shower

Today was my first wedding show. I will say it was super fun! I was kind of bummed that my bridesmaid brandi couldn't come. She said she was 'sick' but, I think she just didn't want to drive. I was also kind of dissapointed my friend Alicia didn't even text me to say 'hey I cant come.' I love her to death, but sometimes its frustrating. Thats what happens with friends. I'm sure there was a reason.

Over all the people who really mtter to me came and thats what counts. It was a good time, and I got some really stinking cute stuff. I hope my family shower is fun next weekend! Well, I should get to bed... I do have to work tomorrow... oh.. and tan! hehe I'm wearing white pants next weekend.. I need to look good.

LOVE.

Soon To Be

Tomorrow is the official four week mark. Four weeks until I'm married. Wow, that is and increddible thought. I've been so blessed. I've finally had a little time to sit and reflect on this. So far everything has been relatively easy. My first wedding shower is this weekend... and WOW am I excited. My favorite people are planning it, so I know it will be good. It is suppose to be flapper and intimates party. I'm excited. My mom was talking about how she hopes I like her gift. I know what she got my sister, I hope it's a 'little more sexy' than hers was. But you know, my mom and I are pretty similiar so I'm sure it will be fine.

So I was thinking today, I hope everything is getting done. I HOPE. haha. It hasn't really set in that I'm going to be married soon. I think the one thing I want to do on my wedding is laugh. I really don't want tears! I really don't have much to say today except my shoes look like the picture above! I got them today. They are a little big, but I think they will work well! hehe pink chucks. OH! and my nephew finally fits into his chucks. That makes me happy. ANYWAY.... I have some ice cream comming my way.

ps mini blog.... -) I'm so excited for my best friend Lesley and her husband. I'm happy that they are blessed to be expecting a little girl !! She is going to be just as beautiful as her mother! I can't wait to see her face!

LOVE.

Somewhere Over The Rainbow

Today was a pretty good day. This morning I went with Aaron to the post office. I got a note to come pick up an envelope, which contained his wedding band. I'm really excited for it! He tried it on and it looked pretty sweet!

I worked most of the day. Let me tell you old cashiers are a pain in the ass. When there are two ppl in your line and no others comming up, you really do not need to call me for all additional. SERIOUSLY. I must have gone up there about my entire two hours I had the walkie. Jeez. It's amazing as well what people will try to do to get a lower price. Just because it seems like you don't speak english, you think you can pull a fast one... guess what!?! You , Cant. Thank you. On the plus side of work it went pretty fast. I don't mind it so much when the day flies by. I have Tuesday off so I will try to enjoy it as much as possible.

I was suppose to wait and see about getting my hair done after work today but bill was booked. We have been trying to find time to do it oh since Feb. I mean there were plenty of times we really could have done it. BUT I secretly think Bill really doesn't want to do it. ANYWAY... we are doing it in the morning which is kinda a hassle for me..... but whatever.

So tuesday is going to be a busy day because I get my hair done around nine, and then we look at a house about 11. Then we have a lot of errands to do. Not to mention, our house needs some seriousl cleaning. I wish that I had the ambition to clean this up every day, but in all honesty ITS TOUGH. I work two jobs. I don't get home till late because I work the entire day. I really don't have time to clean all that much. Plus it's tough because Aaron doesn't allways pitch in. Now, don't get me wrong he will if I ask him to. BUT, he will complain the whole time. It's like jeez, I know it sucks to clean the house but just help me out.

I was working on the last of my invitations tonight and realized there were a couple I didn't mail originally because I didn't have a part of their name or address. Now I mentioned this to aaron and he said 'It should have been done right in the first place'. OKAY. This comment is in bad territory. First, I have a lot to accomplish in a day, and you know that whole week I had been up late working on all of that wedding stuff. Second, I knew it had to get done, I just hadn't gotten the time to do it! I do have two jobs and really no days off. I really didn't respond because it would have been an argument about something stupid. I may just bring it up later.

I think my issue lately is I just don't feel appreciated for the work I put into things and for the things I do. I'm trying as hard as I can. I know I have a tendancy to forget things, but everyone does. I don't have time for myself right now, and people expect the world from me. Where is my world? I mean right now the wedding is getting closer. I appreciate EVERYTHING everyone is doing to help us get ready! I'm happy to have two matrons of honor to help out. My sister has been in her own world lately. idk. She has a lot on her plate and I feel guilty for asking her to do something for the wedding. At the same time I want to be like, 'hey it's my wedding, can you pay a little attention to me' When it was her wedding we were ALL WEDDING ALL THE TIME. I mean is it soo much to ask? I really feel selfish for saying that because I do know it's rough for her having so much on her plate, and her spouse doesn't really help clean that plate. ( if you know what I mean) My brother - in- law really doesn't help her out all that much. I have yet to understand it. Aaron helps me when he can i guess, and sometimes without asking. I guess I will just have to wait for the day of the wedding to have my day. lol. It's gonna be crazy!

Okay, as far as career wise, I've been looking into theater jobs around nebraska. Now, there really aren't much. But I did find that the Omaha Theater Company will hire on makeup and hair for the shows. I really need somthing more. Its tough because I know what I need and I know what I want to do. I just can't find it and don't know how to find it. Please Pray that I can find it.

I think this is enough for now. I've really blogged to much tonight, it's about 1:27 in the morning and I should really be off to bed.

Love.